Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Georgeisms #1

1)

I took Ada (our German Shepherd) to get fixed yesterday at the SPCA. On the way home from picking her up, this was the conversation in the car:

George: "Why does Ada have a booboo on her tummy?"
Me (sensing a long, confusing conversation coming on): "Because she had to have surgery, honey."
George: "Why?"
Me: "To prevent her from having babies." NOTE: I have always worked very hard to stay calm through the incessant why why why why's of childhood. I try to explain everything to the best of my                    
ability or help George look it up so we can learn together. I do not always succeed in staying calm but that's like saying I don't always succeed in being a good mom. Duh. Anyways...
George: "WHY WOULD YOU WANT HER TO NOT HAVE BABIES?" He says completely horrified.
 Me: "Well..... Because when dogs have too many babies there aren't enough willing people to take care of them so they have to be put down."
 George: "What does 'put down' mean?"
                   
NOTE: At this point, I am too far down the rabbit hole to look back. Just keep swimming...

Me: "It means they have to be killed."
George: "WHAT???????"

I don't remember how the conversation ended but I do know it's not my best mothering work. I should have seen where that would have lead right at the beginning but didn't. Oh well. One can only hope George didn't go to school telling other little girls and boys about "cutting stomachs out of dogs so they won't have babies so they don't have to be killed" . I wonder what Ms. Glover thinks goes on in our home since Henry likes to put stuff into George's book bag without us knowing. Like a used bottle, a pacifier, diapers and underwear. Each on separate occasions. Nice right?

2)

Mark and I have a nightly food battle with George to get him to eat what I cook. I know every parent goes through this but it wears you down when the moment you say it's time for dinner the crying begins. It wears you down. I am not a short order cook so George HAS to eat what I make, no matter what. As he has gotten older, though, his strategy has changed. 

Such strategies include:
  • complaining that his stomach hurts. He has stopped using this one recently because he realizes that whenever he says this I say "Ok, then you need to be in bed."
  • complaining that he is too cold and needs various clothing items. Seriously. Tonight he needed a warmer shirt, then his pants were too tight. Finally, his feet were cold and he needed to put his shoes back on. This KIND of works because I can't say to my child "No you have to sit there and be cold. "
  • Bargaining. "Can I just eat two bites of this and two bites of that?"
  • Claiming allergies. 
  • Stalling. I.E fiddling with his shirt, moving the food around his plate, etc. 
  • Crying.
  • Bargaining for weeks in advance. "Can you not make this next week?"
  • Saying he has eaten more than he has actually eaten. 
  • Killing time. He will sit there for HOURS pretending he is eating.
Our strategies include:
  • Yelling. I would be lying if this didn't happen once....or twice...or three times.  I come from a long line of yellers. Don't judge. 
  • Bargaining. "If you eat this, you can have dessert." Since I never make dessert, this usually results in me scrambling to come up with something for dessert.
  • Guilt. "There are less fortunate children that would LOVE to eat this good food." I never thought I would use that line but I did. It didn't work.
  • Having said food for breakfast in the morning.
  • Mini-theater. Mark "Mmmmmm THIS IS SOO GOOOD. IT'S THE BEST FOOD I HAVE EVER EATEN." Me: "I KNOW!! IT IS SO GOOD." 
None of these techniques work in preventing the crying EVERY TIME I announce dinner. It also doesn't prevent him from gagging when he eats the food. Gagging to the point of vomiting. Yeah, that makes me feel good.  Tonight he said something new and completely caught us off-guard:

George, completely serious, says: "I don't need to eat anymore because I have been working out hard at the gym."

No joke. 

And now for some random photos for the grandparents.

There may be a bink addiction. 



This is Henry's Easter Bunny Suit that George loves to wear. Cute!
                                          


I have never been able to duplicate this. 


Fun Dip. Provided by Oma.






Yeah, I let them have fun dip. So?


Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

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